FORGIVENESS IS FOR YOU: SEVEN STEPS TO FORGIVENESS

Forgiveness is a choice. It is a choice to let go of the blame game. While forgiveness is not about condoning the other person’s behavior, it is about not allowing the person’s behavior to have a negative influence on your experience in the present moment. No one has the ability to redo the past. However, we do have the capacity to stop allowing the past to affect us in this moment or our future. By staying stuck in the past you keep yourself from living fully in the present.

Forgiveness is an action step that requires practice. Here are seven steps to help you forgive:

1.      Acknowledge that there is something that needs to be forgiven – whether in yourself or someone else.

2.      Identify thoughts and feelings associated with what the most distressing part of forgiving would be.

3.      Write out your forgiveness on a piece of paper. “I completely and wholeheartedly forgive _____________ (name of person) for __________________ (perceived list of offenses). List it all and get it out like a grievance list.

4.      After reading the list out loud, take a match and burn the forgiveness statement in a safe way. This allows the energy to be transformed.

5.      Create an affirmation and read aloud in a mirror, “I completely and wholeheartedly forgive _______ (person’s name). I refuse to ingest any more toxic energy. I refuse to feel these feelings anymore. I chose to release myself from the past and forgive as a form of self-protection. I am grateful for knowing that I am free and so it is.”

6.      Remember that we are all doing the best we can with what we know and have been taught. We each have moments when we are selfish and act inappropriately. By having compassion for yourself and others, we open our heart. We allow the space for forgiveness and healing to happen.

7.      Embrace forgiveness by taking responsibility for your actions. If there is someone whom you want to apologize to, do this in a sincere manner. When we make amends, we keep our energy clean. It allows forgiveness to become a practice in your life that allows for a joyful state of mind.

By taking these steps, you will be allowed to live a more vibrant, healthy and loving life. You are the creator of your experience. You deserve to live your life free from the toxic energy of the past, including betrayal. It is a practice that happens daily. Be gentle with yourself. When your heart is free of the past hurt, anger, and resentment, it is open to be filled with all that is wonderful and joyous.